Change of thoughts

Dear diary,

When I was 12 years old, I discovered how much negativity there is in this world. We learn about developing countries. The difference between them and any developed country. How our lives are better than theirs. We have more to offer, better well-being, better living conditions, more different food, etc. We even get told that we have more humanity. Those developing countries have war, hunger, murder, rape, slavery, etc. We learn that the way our history is wrong for the humans and that it is the cause of all the misery in the world. If you would ask why our history is on repeat, they will give you a million reasons.

Now, I am 8 years older than when I started to ask questions. I have learned the opposite from everything they tell us. History is wrong but we repeat every single thing, even a thousand times worse. The only difference between them and us is that we only see 10% of the big horror on media that they are experiencing every day.

But if you look closer and you stare at our houses here, what do you see? What is going on behind that door? We find ourselves so much better but it isn't. We have rape, murder, hunger, illness, political war, etc. Gladly, some of us can walk on the streets without any fear. Most off the people that I’ve met have seen horror, have felt what horror is about. It starts all with yourself. I’ve seen parents damaged, I’ve heard damaged children and I felt the pain of many people.

We are so afraid that we live with fear for humanity. We have more media, technology, medication, food, etc… But how far will we go with all of that? More and more people forget to be friendly, social, a human,... Humans and mostly young children start with drinking alcohol, abusing drugs, create illnesses in there mind, are selfish, are materialistic, etc.

We are damaging ourselves with that little history of negativity. We are all trying to fit in, we are all searching ourselves.

More and more people have to see the world, see the beauty of it and see the beauty in it because it's far to find while being capture in this fake ‘idea’ of how the world is. The beauty of the world that isn't touched by humans, isn't destroyed, or hurt by us. How many people that live without being themselves because it matters ‘how high your status is’ in this society. What you wear, what thing you like, what you do, how you live, how you look, how you express, how strong you are… How many people have been touched by money, power, racism, anger, etc.. We forget the fact that animals, nature, humans, children and our planet, they are all victims.

The older I get, the more I see how adults can look at the given horror on a screen or in real life and they easily look away. I see how older people criticise every single person on the media without seeing a human with a soul and a heartbeat, without realising that there is a possibility that they experience a nightmare, every single day. Adults teach their children those habits. We forget that it is wrong what we are doing. It's wrong to judge one single person or a million different ones.

When I was younger, they told me the world is different on every single place, so is each person. They learned me it is wrong to do wrong, to judge, to harm, to hurt, etc. Nowadays they try to learn people how there are groups of humans. They give us labels and teach us how to look first at the outside of a person instead of the personality. Not only the history is to blame with what they teach us. Even our family, social media, believes, education, etc. It all takes away the possibility to think for yourself, to learn about the differences, to meet people who are 'different’ which is exactly everyone around you. So you can experience and see that a big piece of humans just want love and are searching for it but lost there hopes in humanity and themselves.

They give you the idea that any believes, myths, etc.. are wrong or don't exist. Please, tell me why so many different believes are so old, why they believe in a better life, why one day different persons wrote down how it is wrong to treat a living being like that, why we only know maybe 10% of our history and the rest is unprovable, why there are so many questions without an answer and how many people there are who don't believe in murder? In every stage of someones life we believe and hope for a better life because we have to fight and search for happiness these days.

They give you the idea that racism was history but it isn't. When I look at young persons in Belgium, I see more nationalities than I knew when I was a kid. And even now, they dare to say they aren't ‘real’ Belgian people. Even when we are mix, even when the younger people are more and more multicultural they are trying to put culture, nationalities and colours in different groups. We give everybody a different label for their skin and different labels for their mind/personalities to seperate every person from another. And when you look at the history of 'the land of Belgium', what is 'a Belgian person' exactly? How many different nationalities owned the land that is called now Belgium and does a real 100% Belgian person exist?

I know that I will have a reminder of this note and years from now it will be worse. Everything is keeping us stupid, is making us tired, is toxic for us and we are giving up. And the worse of all is that not one single person wants to fight and bring their soul in such a dark place. We want to find ourselves, find love, find peace and find happiness.

Why don't you just be you and I be me.

16/04/2016